i am looking for you. i have been looking for you. i can't stop looking for you.

ever since you left me last spring, i've gone in circles searching...hoping...

i look in all the wrong places...in cigarettes and vodka lemonade...the hypnotic flame of a zippo...in rock 'n' roll...in the books i read...poetry...songs i write...solitude...sunsets...stars in the winter night sky...in the face of the moon...in the pictures you left behind...in the memories from the distant past...strangers in the city...in the boys i don't love...in my dreams...

you're not there...i'm still alone...i'm still lost...i'm still afraid...

and i don't understand...i will never understand...not in this life...